Motivation... how do I get it?!

After my 30 pound mile stone I did some reflection. When I started my weight loss it was just that, weight loss. I began to realize however that there needed to be something more to motivate me than "I don't want to be fat anymore".

I have had a weight problem from about elementary school forward (maybe I will go into further background in a later blog post). I have said for as many years as I have been the 'big girl', "I don't want to be fat anymore" but never did anything about it. What about this time is going to make it stick. Now that I was under 300 pounds I was getting comfortable again. My clothes weren't so tight anymore and I felt a lot better. Sure I was still fat, but I have always been the fat girl so I felt more comfortable in that role.

One of my team members a work started a March of Dimes group and most of my other team members joined in, as did I. It was exciting to be able to raise money for a good cause and at the end we all would be walking a 4 mile walk. So on April 24th 2009 I walked 4 miles. I ended up with some blisters on my feet from wearing crappy shoes but I walked away with a sense of accomplishment. 4 miles, even done slow, was still 4 more miles that I would have never done 7 months ago. This planted a seed to do more.

Many of my podcasts I listened to talked about running different races. I had no idea what the heck a 5K was and figured it was 5 miles. What a relief it was when I discovered that a 5K was only 3.1 miles! On the call in podcast I listened to with Jonathan Roche there were women calling in who had completed different 5K's and other races and athletic events, they would go on and on about how wonderful of an experience it was.... Wait?! running in a race... can be fun??

In the back of my head I kept thinking of the 1 mile run we had to do in gym class like once a month. I always felt like a loser, I don't ever think I passed the mile under 15 minute rule. There would be kids finishing the mile by the time I finished 1 of the 3 laps needed to complete the mile. If I couldn't finish the mile under 15 minutes how could I finish 3.1 miles with competitive runners! Cause aren't all people who run in races super skinny, with legs a mile long and those super short shorts on?!

Despite all my apprehension about runners and races I decided to plant my flag in the ground. I signed up for a 2 mile race, in a town 30 miles away, called the Hog Jog. I figured it would help keep me stay motivated to train for the race, it was not in my own city, which somehow made me more comfortable with it :) and I just wanted the t-shirt that said "hog jog" on it!